The next chapter

I am so ready to welcome this little baby into my arms and into this world.
I am so ready to start the next chapter.

This pregnancy has been hard. It started unexpectedly, nearly didn't make it, almost started pre-term labour, and is now overdue. The emotions of this pregnancy have been beyond overwhelming. After losing Thomas my optimism has been shaken. I used to sit in the baby room and dream. I now sit in the baby room and fight back tears, working very hard to convince myself that I WILL bring home a healthy baby.

I am looking forward to the next chapter because in this part the baby will always be wanted. I feel sad that the child was not planned. That when I found out I was not happy. I feel sad that I cried for 15 weeks about being pregnant. It hurts my heart that I couldn't and didn't cherish every second I knew about this sweet child.
In the next chapter, from the second it arrives, it will be wanted and loved and cherished. Delta will know nothing else.

I'm looking forward to the next chapter, knowing that delta will complete our family. I am thrilled to see how the older three react to the new one. I am beyond excited to watch them grow up together. I'm excited to have a newborn to snuggle ONE MORE TIME and then excited to leave the baby stage behind us.

I am SO excited to not ever be pregnant again.

So Delta, come on out. Please. I love you and can't wait to meet you and snuggle you. And you're late.

So bring on the baby, and say goodbye to the belly.