Happy Thomas Day

I was hesitant to say Happy Thomas Day because I was unsure if "happy" was the right sentiment but you know what? It is.

Today is a day we get to celebrate Thomas as a family. That we get to spend together and be glad we have each other and celebrate that we had another perfect and beautiful boy, if only for a moment.

There were a lot of tears last night. The one and only plan I had for today was to get cupcakes and balloons and let balloons go for Thomas. When I called to order the balloons there was no helium. Anywhere in the city. None. I lost it. Full on ugly cry with tears and snot running freely down my face. Matt held me and then suggested a few other things. I didn't want plan b though. Matt pointed out that life, and especially parenting, IS a series of plan Bs.

So my plan b had me on a hunt for rubber duckies. At 8:00 at night. On a Saturday. When most stores were closed. I finally found some and the girl at the store joking asked if there was a rubber ducky shortage or if I was just stocking up. I teared up and said it was for a memorial for my son. She teared up and asked a couple questions and gave me a hug and told me she would be thinking of me. It was nice.

Today we went to the river. We wrote messages on our duckies and took pictures and said happy Thomas day to each other and threw the ducks in the water. We sent out a ducky each for two other babies gone too soon.

Then the boys ran around in the woods for a while before we went to the near-by playground and had cupcakes. It was really really nice. Laid back, peaceful, fun. I think plan b turned out better than plan a could have.

So happy Thomas Day. And if you see a ducky in a river, think of my Thomas.